I Nearly Shit Myself 3

I Nearly Shit Myself 3
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew M Molloy
Total Pages: 78
Release:
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

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I Nearly Shit Myself 3, is a dark tale from Joe KING that will show you how sometimes it is better to stick with what you have, rather than risk it all. With profanity from the beginning, your sense of humour/humor will be pushed to its limits! When alcoholic scientist Joel discovers a new serum, he soon discovers it not only has the power to make him a monster in bed, but it also has a side effort so horrific, it makes his life a living nightmare! As Joel’s drinking gets out of control, so does his life and unknowing to him, he is killing people. With his time running out, will he live long enough to find a way out of this horror story he has created for himself? Or will he just have to accept, the serum he has taken was never going to have a happy ending! I Nearly Shit Myself 3 is now being published as, The PLONKER with an alternative ending.

I Nearly Shit Myself: Books 1-4.

I Nearly Shit Myself: Books 1-4.
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew M Molloy
Total Pages: 188
Release:
Genre: Humor
ISBN:

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I Nearly Shit Myself #1. Do you believe in ghosts? Bill End doesn't, but as his first night back as a Security Guard, he soon realises they are real, VERY real. Not only are they out to scare him, but they are also out to take his mind, body and soul. Will he make it through the night, with his sanity and soul intact? Or will he become something else! With randy ghost William Moorcock on his back, ANYTHING is possible! I Nearly Shit Myself #2. A chemical leak has led to a strange creature growing in the sewers and is now seeking human flesh to reproduce. When people start to go missing in very unusual circumstances, the case is given to detective Mack McKenzie & his new sidekick Steve. Something weird is happening to the people of the city, and they soon realise they will have to go down the sewers to find out what is killing all of them. Will they find out who, and what, is causing them to disappear? Or will it all just get flushed down the pan! I Nearly Shit Myself #3. When alcoholic scientist Joel discovers a new serum, he soon discovers it not only has the power to make him a monster in bed, but it also has a side effort so horrific, it makes his life a living nightmare! As his drinking gets out of control, so does his life and unknowing to him, he is killing people. With his time running out, will he live long enough to find a way out of this horror story he has created for himself? Or will he just have to accept, the serum he has taken was never going to have a happy ending! I Nearly Shit Myself #4. When Ben and his girlfriend decide to go for a naughty weekend away at a disused reservoir. They should have heeded the warning sign. KEEP OUT. NO SWIMMING. After their weekend is cut short, and they return home, the real horror begins! The, I Nearly Shit Myself, series are now being published under new titles with alternative endings.

I Nearly Shit Myself 1

I Nearly Shit Myself 1
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew M Molloy
Total Pages: 94
Release: 2017-05-15
Genre: Young Adult Fiction
ISBN: 1521301727

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A fun story packed with comedy/ horror, humour and a hugely different type of ghost, which will leave you looking down the toilet before you commit yourself, that is if your sense of humour is up to it! Do you believe in ghosts? Bill begins to think differently as his first night shift back as a Security Guard gets off to a bumpy start and he soon realises they are real, VERY real. Not only are they out to scare him, but they are also out to take his mind, body and soul. Will he make it through the night, with his sanity and soul intact? Or will he become something else! With randy ghost William Moorcock on his back, ANYTHING is possible during the Night Shift from hell. This book is now published as… Night Shift. Horror & Hilarity with a Banana Taste! This edition has an alternative ending.

I Nearly Shit Myself 4

I Nearly Shit Myself 4
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew m Molloy
Total Pages: 62
Release:
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

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I Nearly Shit Myself 4: Nature has a funny way of doing things sometimes, and it only takes a slight change in an Ecosystem and everything can go to pot. Take parasites for example, they have developed themselves over millions of years, and even use us humans for their own ends. Like the unassuming tapeworm. Their reproduction can be quite amazing and the lengths they will go to get what they want, and like all living things, the end goal is to reproduce and multiply, but when humans get involved, it generally does not end well! When Ben and his girlfriend decide to go for a naughty weekend away at a disused reservoir. They should have heeded the warning sign. KEEP OUT. NO SWIMMING. After their weekend is cut short, and they return home, the real horror begins! I Nearly Shit Myself, are a series of books that are written for the sole purpose of humour, but not just any old humour. This series of books are aimed at readers with a warped and twisted sense of humour/humor. You have been warned. PG 18.

I Nearly Shit Myself 2

I Nearly Shit Myself 2
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew m Molloy
Total Pages: 86
Release:
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

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I Nearly Shit Myself 2, is a comedy/horror story with a strange type of entity, which will leave you looking down the toilet before you commit yourself, that is if your sense of humour is up to it! This fun detective story from Joe KING, has plenty of humour/humor to give you something quite different to read! A chemical leak has led to a strange creature growing in the sewers and is now seeking human flesh to reproduce. When people start to go missing in very unusual circumstances, the case is given to detective Mack McKenzie & his new sidekick Steve. Something weird is happening to the people of the city, and they soon realise they will have to go down the sewers to find out what is killing all of them. Will they find out who, and what, is causing them to disappear? Or will it all just get flushed down the pan!

Shadow Figure: Part 1. Earth Extinction

Shadow Figure: Part 1. Earth Extinction
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew M Molloy
Total Pages: 223
Release:
Genre: Young Adult Fiction
ISBN:

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When Zoe Read decides that having sex in the local woodlands was a good idea to lift her relationships ailing sex life, little did she realise that she was being watched. This watcher, though, was no ordinary voyeur. The shadow figure she sees while having her fun is going to change her life beyond her wildest dreams. The shadow figure, a dark malevolent featureless outline of a human, has been tracking her. Waiting, and timing the arrival to this very moment in Zoe’s life. The future is coming. A future that has set the Earth as Zoe knows it on its extinction day. Many things have been going wrong with society. Many things that the Others believe they can change for the better of humanity, but not humanity for the good of all. A humanity that is set to realign a path that has now been broken. John Oaks has discovered a signal from a rogue satellite. His life is one of paranormal investigations and so far, he has found nothing more interesting that a plume of smoke he believes is a visitation from another world. The signal he had discovered will be way beyond his comprehension as his investigation takes on a new level of understanding as the military takes over what he thought was something he had control over. Sergeant, and a professor, Sam Steel is head of the investigation team for the military, as John soon discovers when he is kidnapped. Their connections are strong, and they somehow know each other but not of this timeline, a timeline they know they must have been linked together somehow. With a new understanding and the seriousness of what he learns, his life also spirals out of this world to become another cog in the machine of the universe. A portal so advanced becomes his nemesis and his best friend as the team he has now assigned to discover how far the Others will go to retain the path the Earth is set to follow. Some things in life are meant to be discovered. Other things, well…knowing when to walk away is not so easy when you are a human of form! With timelines interfering with the Earth’s destiny and the Others racing to undo all that has been set in motion, an Earth end date is looming, and a race begins to save the planet and the billions of lives that are set to be destroyed in this science fiction thriller.

Oh Crap! Potty Training

Oh Crap! Potty Training
Author: Jamie Glowacki
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 167
Release: 2015-06-16
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1501122991

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From potty-training expert and social worker Jamie Glowacki, who’s already helped over half a million families successfully toilet train their preschoolers, comes a newly revised and updated guide that’s “straight-up, parent-tested, and funny to boot” (Amber Dusick, author of Parenting: Illustrated with Crappy Pictures). Worried about potty training? Let Jamie Glowacki, potty-training expert, show you how it’s done. Her six-step, proven process to get your toddler out of diapers and onto the toilet has already worked for tens of thousands of kids and their parents. Here’s the good news: your child is probably ready to be potty trained EARLIER than you think (ideally, between 20–30 months), and it can be done FASTER than you expect (most kids get the basics in a few days—but Jamie’s got you covered even if it takes a little longer). If you’ve ever said to yourself: -How do I know if my kid is ready? -Why won’t my child poop in the potty? -How do I avoid “potty power struggles”? -How can I get their daycare provider on board? -My kid was doing so well—why is he regressing? -And what about nighttime?! Oh Crap! Potty Training can solve all of these (and other) common issues. This isn’t theory, you’re not bribing with candy, and there are no gimmicks. This is real-world, from-the-trenches potty training information—all the questions and all the answers you need to do it once and be done with diapers for good.

The SIGNAL: Part Five. Liev Malik

The SIGNAL: Part Five. Liev Malik
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew M Molloy
Total Pages: 196
Release: 2022-04-15
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

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As this epic Sci fi concludes, Ava has finally discovered how to correct all her mistakes, but like everything she is learning about humans, they never do as she predicts. Liev Malik is the only one who can change the past to recover a possible future. Time again is running out to stop the planet from regressing into anarchy. With each Nexus point returned to, a new wave of destruction threatens all life on Earth. Nova, the nemesis Ava must destroy, is also learning and planning to preserve her own self inside the invisible world she resides in. But not for the greater good of the human species, she wants the world for herself. As Liev Malik's life gets turned inside out, and Ava trying to figure out how to reverse all that the Earth has gone through, Liev Malik is once again called upon to rid the planet of those that have wrought havoc as his role is made clear. Kill, with no remorse for those select few that believe their own interests are greater than the masses. Ava must leave no traces of her existence behind but falling in love is something she had never planned for and doubts emerge on what she must do. Wrestling with her own emotions, there was only ever one real choice, but other people with their own ideas trying to stop her, the utopian nexus she must find was never going to be easy but leaving Rebecca will be the hardest thing she has ever had to do.

The Sausage Man

The Sausage Man
Author: Joe KING
Publisher: Andrew M Molloy
Total Pages: 61
Release:
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

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When Gavin Granger relocates to Tameworth to sell his brand of sausage, little did he realise that things were going to take a turn for the worse, and the better, in this short tale of humour and a mild dose of horror. For years, Gavin had been selling his exotic sausage from his pitch up North, but as things got a little hairy and trade took a tumble, Tameworth was his choice of relocation. With a newfound zeal to sell his special brand of sausage from his van and his new pitch, things were going well until the locals began to suspect there was more to his sausage than just the porky variety. As things escalate out of his control, and the police sniff round his sausage, Gavin must come up with a plan to get out of this mess that is mounting up and fast. With his livelihood in jeopardy once more, rumours soon begin to take on a life of their own as two local business he has had dealings with mysteriously disappear, causing Gavin to rethink his exotic brand of sausage with his secret ingredient in and come up with a plan that keeps his dream of selling his sausage alive! With local pets going missing, fingers soon point to one man and his sausage. Will Gavin find a way out of this mess or will his small sausage business get shafted? Determined to survive, there was only one way forward for Gavin the sausage man. More.

Wildfire (Men of Inked: Heatwave #3)

Wildfire (Men of Inked: Heatwave #3)
Author: Chelle Bliss
Publisher: Bliss Ink LLC
Total Pages: 242
Release: 2020-03-03
Genre: Fiction
ISBN:

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Tamara Gallo knew she was missing something in life. Looking for adventure, she takes off, searching for a hot biker who can deliver more than a good time. But once inside the Disciples Compound, she may get more than she bargained for. The badass biker thought he had everything he wanted. He had his freedom, the open road, and the brotherhood. But after being tasked with protecting an innocent, he realizes he’s missing the most important thing of all…​ But can the bossy biker tame the wild child, or will she be too much for even him to handle? Wildfire is the third interconnected standalone in the new steamy MC romance Men of Inked: Heatwave series by Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestselling author Chelle Bliss. *** What people are saying about the Heatwave Series "I loved this book!!" -Corinne Michaels, NYT bestselling author "This book will blow your mind." -Chelsea Camaron, USA Today bestselling author "Fast-paced, twist, turns, and a whole lot of FLAME" -Kaylee Ryan, NYT bestselling author "Blown away!" -Fiction Beer & Cupcakes "I inhaled this engaging tale!" -Books & Bindings "A fictional world that absolutely had me wanting more!" -Angel Payne "Chelle is hitting all the high notes in this first book in what promises to be a great series!" -Jasinda Wilder "Holy cow!! What an absolutely awesome book" -Cat's Guilty Pleasure "What a freaking amazing read." -Bookhaven Book Blog "HOT. HOT. HOT." -Ruth Cardello, NYT bestselling author **** Topics: MC romance, men of inked, biker romance, romance saga, romantic suspense, series starter, first in series, romance series, romance saga, romantic family saga, new release, tattooed heroes, forbidden romance, second chance romance, small-town romance, hidden romance, strong alpha, alpha hero, family business, strong female lead, strong heroine, family secrets, new releases, top romance reads, Helen Hardt, Charlotte Byrd, Penelope Sky, E L James, Anna Todd, Avon Books, Harlequin Books, Nora Roberts, Bella Andre, Lexi Ryan, Penny Reid, Liliana Rhodes, Lexi Blake, Charlotte Byrd, Julia Kent Perfect for the fans of Lauren Blakely, Nana Malone, Meghan March, Penny Reid, Skye Warren, Kendall Ryan, Kennedy Fox, Lexi Blake, Carrie Ann Ryan, Katie McCoy, and Penelope Ward