The author has an inferiority complex. She grew up in a financially poor family with both of her parents, two grandmothers and seven siblings. She was the oldest girl in the family. While she was never mistreated, she was neglected. She had to help with certain farm chores as well as to help with household duties and care for the younger ones. Her dad was very critical of her, now matter how hard she tried to please him. She is very much an introvert and feels uncomfortable in social situations. As a senior citizen today, she wonders why her family doesn't keep in touch with her. She knows that this life is her battle for perfection, and that she must suffer and overcome in order to cross over to the other side. There are times when she finds this difficult and she writes to obtain relief. It seems to work for her.